The Pilgrim Congress

There is probably nothing I hate more than when someone forwards me some asinine email about crime rates, or people of Walmart, or a video of some kid dancing to some piece of music that makes my ears bleed.  Lets just all agree that the Internet is a truly awesome place, full of wonder and [...]

I hate Christmas.  For many reasons, some of which I will outline for you here:
1.)    I do not like events that require “family time.”  I feel this is self-explanatory, but in case its not, I’ll elaborate:  My family is crazy and holidays generally descend into arguing about topics ranging from income taxes to various family [...]

Happy Thanksgiving Americans!!  This is my favorite holiday.  Why?  Many reasons, allow me to elaborate:

I Hate Turkeys.  I live in New Hampshire, and in case you weren’t aware, New Hampshire is overrun with turkeys.  Also, in case you weren’t aware, turkeys are assholes.  They chase small children.  They also surround my Jeep and force me [...]

Hey, guess what?  I am never moving again.  I am going to die in this place.  You see, my system is delicate and cannot handle things like “change,” or stuff that is “new,” or anything that is not “exactly the way it should be.” 
Don’t get me wrong, I was so incredibly excited to move.  I [...]

Hey would you like to know where I live?  For stalking purposes or otherwise?  Well, let me tell you then.  I live in a little state called New Hampshire.  Otherwise known as the LIVE FREE OR DIE state.  No, seriously, that’s our motto.  We’re pretty fucking awesome up here.
New Hampshire enjoys about 3.2 miles of [...]

Hey guess what?  I live in New England, which means there is a plethora of historical shit all over the place.  And guess what else?  I love it. 
So today, The Husband and I decided to enjoy the glorious New England weather (which quickly turned less than glorious because, well, we’re in New England) and go toStrawbery [...]

I’m going to try very hard to utilize the skills my therapist has tried to teach me and write this without crying… I am lactose intolerant.  Pause here for long racking sobs directed at the sky and accompanied by violent fist shaking.
I can never eat ice cream, or mac and cheese, or cannolis, or clam chowder again. 
My life?  [...]

Oh, is that not how you celebrate that its the weekend?  Just me?  Well then…
Onto the business!  What to do this weekend?  Various events for your enjoyment:

DeCordova’s Art in the Park Festival, Lincoln, MA: I have a secret to tell you, but you have to promise not to judge me too harshly.  I often begin [...]

Can you tell I like Redhook?  Are you beginning to wonder if they’re paying me?  Well, they’re not.  But they probably should be.  HEAR THAT REDHOOK!  I’M PLUGGING YOUR SHIT ALL OVER MY SITE!  PLEASE TO BE GIVING ME MONEY!  Think they heard me? 
Well now that we’ve established that I am an unbiased reviewer who just [...]

This isn’t actually a scary post, I don’t know why I titled it like that.  I just felt like it and this is my site, so I went with it.  I am drunk with freedom!
Anywho, I was actually planning on writing a little bit about what’s going on this weekend in New England.  I’m going [...]